My mood has changed i am up yet again..Being depressed is like riding an out of control rollercoaster..Unless youve been on it how can you understand it..
When i get really down i feel like im dropping into a big hole like in Alice in wonderland..i know im going down but i cant grasp anything to hold me up..it can be triggered by a lot of things too.
I get angry with everyone and everything for petty little things, i get paranoia and think im being followed..i know its all in my head when im having a rational day like today..i re read my last entry and to be honest my other half isnt waiting for anyone else ..its my insecurity... my mind playing tricks on me.
Why would he wait? I mean if he wanted someone else i couldnt and wouldnt stop him going.We only have one crack at life and its meant to be lived.I learnt that when i was married..i think i saved us both from a crap life by getting divorced.Is he grateful? Is he hell ..hes so bitter and twisted about it and i feel nothing..He should be grateful..he got a free divorce because i paid for it and he got a lot more out of it than i did..in the fiscal sense..i got my freedom and paid a high price for it but it was worth every penny!
Well im aware i am having a good day so i wont sit here for long...i think im going to scrap.
2 comments:
You have been tagged! Go to my blog to see what you have to do.
Chin up hun, we all have these moments (well I do anyway)
:)
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